How Overfunctioning Shows Up in Leadership

I took a break this summer.

And no — I wasn't sipping cocktails on a beach in Maine the whole time. (Ok. I did that for a weekend. It was amazing.) The rest of the summer, I spoke to my clients regularly, onboarded new ones, and tackled some big projects I'd had brewing for months.

But I stepped away from every regular business habit and system I had in place. And I probably should have done it a lot sooner than this summer. I nearly drove myself into the ground because I couldn't follow my own damn advice.

What Is Overfunctioning?

Overfunctioning isn't just "doing a lot." Plenty of people do a lot and still feel fine. Overfunctioning is doing a lot because stopping feels dangerous. 

For high achievers, it usually looks like this: you take on more than your role requires because you're not sure anyone else will do it right. You say yes before you've checked whether you have room. You treat every task like it's equally urgent, because ranking them would mean admitting some things matter less – and choosing what matters less feels like failing at all of it.

This is NOT about ambition or having a strong work ethic. It's about having a nervous system that's confused "I can handle this" with "I have to handle this, or something bad happens."

Overfunctioning is driven by anxiety – fear of failure, fear of letting people down, fear of never being enough or not having enough. 

What Overfunctioning Looks Like in Leadership

Overfunctioning doesn't feel like a problem while you're doing it (even though you probably never feel fully rested and you’re constantly overwhelmed). It feels like responsibility. 

I felt like I was being responsible and just doing the things that needed to get done. 

The problem wasn’t so much that I said yes to some new things. The problem was that when I said yes, I didn’t say no to anything else. 

Plus I treated all of them like they carried the same weight - all of it got treated like it was the most important. 

When your mind is spinning so fast you can't see straight, that's not a sign to push harder. That's an alarm telling you to stop.

So I finally did.

Great Leadership or Overfunctioning? 

You're the one who reviews everything before it goes out, even work you've already delegated. 

You're in every meeting "just in case." 

You say yes to the new initiative because turning it down might look like you can't handle your job. 

Your team doesn't bring you problems anymore because you've quietly trained them to know you'll just take it and fix it yourself.

It’s also overthinking and overfeeling for others in a way that interferes with their self-efficacy. In other words, even if none of these other things apply to you, if you’re the office therapist, you’re probably overfunctioning. 

From the outside, it looks like commitment, care, and high standards. 

But overfunctioning leaders create underfunctioning and dysfunctional teams. 

When you catch every ball before it drops, nobody else learns to catch. 

When you're available for everything, nobody else has to build the judgment to decide what really needs your attention. 

You end up with a team that's capable on paper and dependent in practice – a leader who's exhausted and can't figure out why nothing runs without them.

The fix needs to be intentional. You can’t just decide you’re taking on less and hope it all works out. You need to determine where you’re needed and let others be responsible for the rest – including the mistake they make and fixing them. 

The Three Rules I'd Been Ignoring

Here’s how I started. 

I stripped everything down to the bare necessities. I looked at what mattered most - in both my business and in my life. Then I slowly added the most important things back, one at a time.

That's when I saw that I’d been breaking all of my own rules:

• When you say yes to something new, say no to something else. Saying yes to everything is costing you more than you think — every yes without a no just compounds the overload.

• When everything is important, nothing is important. Everything can not carry the same amount of urgency at the same time. Prioritization is imperative. 

• You often need to slow down in order to speed up. This is the one I resisted hardest. The idea of stopping – or even slowing down – is kryptonite for most of us. It just doesn’t seem possible. But it’s the most important step. Slowing down allows us to be discerning about what we have capacity for and if it aligns with the goals we’re setting. 

I was convinced that slowing down would derail everything. Which is probably exactly why I waited until I was about to implode before I did it.

I'm happy to report I was completely wrong.

What Slowing Down Taught Me About The Priorities

Sometimes you need to step away just to see the whole picture. And from where I'm standing now, the view is a lot clearer.

Overfunctioning convinces you that stopping is the risk. 

But you can’t see the full picture if you don’t stop and take stock.

Self Leadership Practice: 

• What can you take off your plate?

• Where do you need to slow down in order to speed up?

• What would happen if you hit pause on just one thing?

Overfunctioning tells you that stopping is the risk. But the real risk is staying so busy carrying everything that you never find out what was truly worth carrying in the first place.

If "saying yes to everything" sounds familiar, my free guide How to Stop Saying Yes When You Mean No walks through exactly how to start taking things off your plate — without the guilt spiral.